Quite the melodramatic title, no? Today is my birthday. And it is not a happy occasion. Luckily, only one person has said “happy birthday” and that was over the phone, so I couldn’t hit them (her, it was my mom). I am officially out of my teen years. Another unhappy thing. I never thought (or wanted) I’d make it to 20. I didn’t think I’d make it to 18 (didn’t want to then either). The one good thing that was supposed to happen today turned out bad. Of course. Cynthia took me to Red Lobster like she said she would. Karen (the probably cousin) took us. I’ve been eating the same thing there since I was 11, or slightly younger. And I ate it the last time I was there, sometime in April. But when I went there today. Gone. They took my favorite dish, and the only thing I liked, off the menu. Bye bye Crab Linguini Alfredo. Hello Shrimp and Crab Linguini Alfredo with tomatoes for $4 more. So I got to eat flounder, which I don’t particularly like, I’m not a fish person, gagging on it the entire time. I almost cried when the woman said they didn’t have my dish anymore. It might sound silly to cry over spaghetti, but I only get to Red Lobster a few times a year, and I always look forward to it. I was looking forward to it this time, the only thing I had to look forward too, and it turned out horribly. I did get my Chocolate Wave cake, but I was so filled on disgusting flounder that I couldn’t eat it all. I didn’t think of it til I got home, but why couldn’t they still have given me Crab Linguini Alfredo? All they’d have to do is not put in the shrimp and tomatoes. What’s the big deal? When we got back my mom had called, so I called her and told her what happened. She’s the one who wished me the happy birthday, nothing happy about it. I haven’t celebrated my birthday in years, I don’t see what’s to celebrate in the worst day of my life. Since I was a kid I always thought it would have been better if I hadn’t been born. My mother said she still wasn’t feeling well, so she still hadn’t gone to the store, and she might tomorrow. She also said no other cards for me had come, not from Cyndy or Nita, just the one from Pap Pap.

Cyndy did call yesterday. She called my mom (or my mom called her), and while talking to her found out I was staying up here. Apparently my mom told her all about her troubles, how she was fired, and no one would hire her (it would help if she’d apply at a few places). Cyndy doesn’t like the white trash bastard either. When I talked to Cynthia after, Cyndy had told her she had met him once, and I’d already told her what an ass he was. Even Cyndy said that if I guy starts acting like that, you get rid of him in the beginning. Cyndy asked me how I was and I gave the usual “fine”. She said I could always call her if I wanted to do something. She mentioned the Aviary, which would be nice, but it sounded like she’d been drinking, so she might not remember if I said something, and the way she was talking sounded so much like my mother that it upset me.

My mom said it was good that I got out at all, but I would have rather not gone if I had known this would happen. I wasn’t in a particularly good mood this morning, but I was in a better mood when I woke up than I am now. At least the last “new” Poirot is on PBS tonight if the power doesn’t go out again and if the station is coming in right.